July 23rd, 2018
Truth lies in the Darkness?
In the darkness I find only silence except my thoughts.
Perhaps this is where the truth lies, in the darkness...
Not in the light where things are distorted,
but in the darkness where there is no illusions to fool you.
only your own mind to meditate on what's real.
I lay at night in the dark thinking about the world.
A world of both chaos and yet strange order.
A world of both suffering and happiness.
And can only wonder what I can do to help.
Such unneeded sadness in peoples eyes.
I thought enlightenment would help me see beauty,
but it instead showed me the truth both good and bad.
Now with the weight of the world on my shoulders I am froze.
Speechless and confused what to do from here on.
I can no longer live just for myself.
I have decided to become a bodhisattva and there is no turning back now.
But I'm not sure if this is a blessing or a curse.
Either way I feel I should remain silent with what I see.
Though it weighs heavy on my heart I have no choice but to bare it.
So much suffering due to ignorance, how can I help.
Day after day I just am froze, trapped in my own misery of compassion...
I want to speak out but the words won't come.
All I can do is try to enjoy the small blessings from day to day giving me hope of something better to come.
A world without so much ignorance, a world of uber mensch.
A world of Buddhas and Bodhisattva's to turn to in times of suffering.
Wisdom and Love are the only things I know to end the suffering.
Wisdom of the four noble truths is the only thing keeping me sane from the chaotic world around me.
But if I try to speak of them people turn away and close their ears.
Fools laugh at Tao and attainment, why because they blind themselves to truth.
They live in the light thinking that is where truth lies, readily believing what they wish to believe.
Seeing only what they wish to see.
Seeing only the shadows of the real thing.
Wes D. Sturdevant